Brutal Honesty

2003-11-19

Why do relationships have to be such a puzzle? Why can't we be honest, say our true feelings and having things work out? Why is it it always works in the movies? Why is it that when we are watching the movies 1/2 the time the only real conflict is the main character won't say what they are really feeling. We all scream! "TELL HER!!!" or "TELL HIM!!!" and yet in real life that never seems to work unless you already know their response?

8 years ago when I worked at Big Grub in Irvine my partners and I used to go to a Thai restaurant and at this restaurant were two very beautiful women with Asian features. That would not be uncommon, you can go to lots of places in the greater LA area and see beautiful women with Asian features.

But, one of the two women, she was different for me. She wasn't just beautiful. She gave me the shivers. I could barely contain myself when she was around. I used to tell my buddies that she could never be my girlfriend because I would just sit there in awe gaping not able to think a coherent thought.

Time went by, I never said anything. The best we did was we were having a company Halloween party, we had made flyers and next time we were at the restaurant we gave her and the other waitress an invite/flyer and encouraged them to come. Of course they didn't show.

A few weeks later the woman that made me crazy quit and I assumed that was the last I would ever see her.

About 6 months later my friend Willis and I are looking for something new to eat and we see there is an Indonesian deli on the other side of Orange County and with nothing better to do on a Sunday we decide to go check it out. We get there and it's a little deli of a place. A single deli style display and 3 tables. We order and while we are waiting for our food to come up the girl that made me crazy walks in. She recognizes us and it turns out she is Indonesian, going to college and she said we wouldn't believe her major but she won't tell us. That's about the end of our conversation and she's gone.

I always regretted not telling her just how crazy of an effect she had on me. I didn't want to tell her hoping something would come of it. I just wanted to tell her that to me she was by far the most beautiful woman I had or would ever see and that I wasn't just saying it but that I felt it through and through. Almost like she was a visual virus for my brain. I wanted to tell her because how often does something like that happen?

Well, this year, I met another woman with a similar effect on me...

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Design Festa 2003-11
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